Elena and I have been happily married for almost 15 years, but relationships never come without a challenge.
If you’re married, how would you rate your level of satisfaction with the relationship on the scale of 1-10?
A 10 would be everything is perfect, you communicate at the right times in the right way, your love life is frequent and exciting, your short and long term goals and dreams are perfectly aligned, and your relationship continues to grow in new ways every week.
If you are anything short of a 7, it’s possible you’re in a rut. Don’t be deceived, even great marriages can get in temporary ruts.
The definition of a rut is, “a habit or pattern of behavior that has become dull and unproductive but is hard to change.”
A rut will cause the two of you to stop growing—and start growing apart.
When something begins to fade, it’s because something is stale.
Here are 4 Steps to Break Out of Your Routine:
#1 Make a commitment to breaking out of the rut.
The first thing you need to do is to get committed about reversing the damage. Creativity follows commitment. Until you become committed you are wasting your time and setting yourself up for failure.
#2 Talk to new people, network with others together.
I know people who have the same exact set of friends since they were 13 years old. Dude, get a new set of friends! If you have the same social circle as you did five or ten years ago, then you aren’t growing. Get out and meet people. If it’s scary—tough. What’s scarier is staying in a rut, shrinking, and letting your marriage turn to garbage.
#3 Change your environment.
Change can guarantee one thing—something new. Whether good or bad, at least it’s different. Remember if things stay the same, the staleness will only grow worse.
#4 Switch roles with your spouse.
Whatever you can do to bring about change will immediately stop the growing staleness and bring something fresh in. Switch things up, go opposite, and the more uncomfortable it feels the better.
When talking about the idea of marriage a lot of people say stuff like, “I’m gonna settle down and ___________”.
Why does marriage have to be about “settling down”?
You’re not cement.
You shouldn’t be settling down for anything!
To keep your relationship fresh you must get your eyes on the future and start fantasizing and dreaming big together.
Remember, if things are stale in your relationship, you probably…
- are living in the past to some degree
- haven’t met anyone new in a while
- aren’t focused together on any big goals
You need to create within your relationship so that it keeps doing something. Everybody has the innate ability to create.
2 Simple Ways to Create Within Your Relationship:
- Quit waiting for things to happen.
- Commit to creating.
Remember, don’t wait for your lover to become romantic, you become the romantic and see what comes out of it.
Take initiative and get creative within the relationship and things will stay fresh!
Here’s a challenge for you:
If you’re in any kind of rut in your marriage, bring yourself and your spouse to 10X Growth Conference 3.
This is the world’s largest business conference and it will have something for everyone. It’s about 10Xing your income and your life.
Get on the same page together and have an amazing 3-day experience. Take it from me, 10X is a principle that will not just improve your finances, it will improve your marriage.
Reserve your seats HERE.
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