It’s common for people who don’t get what they want to provide justifications – and even lie to themselves – by minimizing how valuable success is to them. They become disappointed for a bit before trying to convince themselves that they never wanted it in the first place.
It’s okay to admit that you wanted something that didn’t come to fruition. Doing this will actually help you in eventually reaching that goal regardless of the obstacles that come up.
Success always comes as a result of earlier actions – no matter how seemingly insignificant they are or how long ago they were taken. Learn from your prior transactions, especially those that weren’t successful, so that you can train yourself to do better next time and get exactly what you want.