I think you would agree nothing is more important than the love of your family. For much of my younger life I searched for love in the same manner I built my sales career and first businesses – everyone was a prospect. But when you find that special love it’s different. I share this story in my book, Sell or Be Sold in the Chapter titled “The Biggest Sale of My Life.” In this chapter I talk about the most important sale of my life and how I convinced my wife to go out with me and then marry me. I talk about how important love for family, business and your clients is to growing your family and your business. Nothing has proved more valuable to me in my life than my love for family, business and life – nothing!
The problem in my search for love early on was not the manner in which I went about my search but the way in which I defined love itself. I used to measure love based on on what I was feeling. That unbelievable sensation of love is so intoxicating, so compelling. But with that comes a couple of problems; 1) I was being the effect of this sensation and 2) the feeling was fleeting, impossible to keep.
Today, with a bit more maturity than a young man on the hunt, I know that love is much more than a feeling, sensation or some fleeting compulsion. Love is not just limited to something you and I only feel or experience. Love is an action. Love, for me, is something I do not something I only feel or talk about.
Also love is not limited to just one person. I love many people; my wife whom I cherish. My kids who I would die for. My brothers, sisters, mom, and dad, who formulated the earlier years of my life and mean so much to me today. Then there are my friends that I love, as well as co-workers that I admire and depend on. Then there are those things that I love like my business, my clients, my employees, the community I live in, my church, my products, my dreams of tomorrow and on and on. Love is not limited to just those closest to me, nor is it limited to people.
For me love is what I do for each of these things that I admire and care for. Love for my wife means taking care of her and us, ensuring our future, guaranteeing our happiness, spending time together, creating a life where we can experience and grow together. For my kids it’s similar, yet different. I have to make time for them so they can get to know me, see me, experience me, not just feel me or hear from me. To love my kids means I have to be productive in my career when I am at work so that I can give them my full attention and be with them when I am not working. Same goes for my business, clients, employees, community, my church, and my country. It’s easy to say you love something. It takes a lot more to show you love something through your actions.
I see love much like I see courage. Courage means you take action even though you’re fearful, and love many times means I am doing something that is uncomfortable, inconvenient and requires effort. I find the more I practice demonstrating love the more capacity I have to experience love.
I challenge you to consider how you express yourself with what you do rather than what you say.
Make a list of all the things you love and then write down what you can do to express that love.
Hope this message wasn’t too sappy for you – but really, what is work and success without love?